Air Out Your Laundry | Sept. 2014

Air-Out_LaundryDear Readers,

Wow this is some dammed mild summer, but there are no complaints from me. I’m not big on the heat anyway. Anyone who knows me knows I love the fall and winter. As I’m writing this column today I’m taking a day trip to Ellensville NY. Now I have a question? Is it me or are the leaves turning colors and falling a little early? Seems odd, but then again I’m re-reading George Orwells 1984 and what is going on in this world and our technology… I’m seeing a lot of odd things.

Ah……….anyhow, go read my column and laugh!

++ Dear Mistress

I’ve been with my boyfriend for many years on and off, the past two have been steady. We’ve talked future and living together, but there is one thing wrong, his X. She’s been saying she’s getting her stuff out for a long while now and still hasn’t. I’m tired of opening the cabinet in the bathroom and having her stuff pop out……………(cut off)

~~ Dear Stupid,

Take her stuff and pack it. Round it up, bag it and place it in the basement, or garage. Better yet, GIVE IT TO GOODWILL cause it isn’t doing any good hanging out with you and the boyfriend.

++ Dear Mistress,

I’m dating this girl who isn’t the most beautiful, or well-spoken individual, but she is a hard worker, owns a home, owns 2 bikes and treats me very well. My group of guy friends are always telling me that I can do better, or  that she’s not much to look at………………(cut off)

~~ Dear Ugly Duckling,

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And if your so called friends are that shallow, I suggest you find a new group to chill with. On second thought, that fact that you wrote in to even ask doesn’t say much about you as a person. I’d love to get a look at you and your friends. My guess is that you guys were probably at the end of the line when they were passing our good looks.

++ Dear Mistress

My guy is about to hit 50 years old and is whining like a pu@*y. I want to throw him a party, but with his whining I’m not sure if it would go over well. Do you have suggestions on how to go about doing something for his 50th?

~~ Dear Over the Hill

I suggest you get him a box of Tampax, a bottle of Midol and call it a day!

++ Dear Mistress,

I’m a young, gay, male that really likes this older non-gay male, but he won’t………………………(cut off)

~~ Dear Get Over it

Dude, I can honestly say this without reading the rest of your email………KNOCK IT OFF BEFORE THIS GUY KNOCKS YOUR TEETH DOWN YOUR THROAT!

Need advice? Write me at –



August 24th Full Throttle Magazine 12th Annual Anniversary/8th Annual Biker Build-Off/12th Annual Dee’s Ride Kick-Off Party. Red River In 450 Main St. Yaphank NY. Noon -6pm. Rain Date August 31st

September 7th 12th Annual Dee’s Ride to Benefit LI Cares. Lido Beach. Reg 9:00am KU 11:00. Return to Lido for music, vendors, food, raffles and more.

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