Air Out Your Laundry Oct.


Oct 2013 (for my entertainment as always)

Dear Readers,

It’s that time of year, Halloween is upon us! This year is going to be rough. I lost a lot of my Halloween props in my move last year and I also don’t know how Uncle will take to me building a grave yard in his yard. Maybe after a glass of wine or two, I will ask him. As I sit here and reminisce upon those who have passed before me, I know at least All Hallows Eve I will set an extra plate of goodies out for them, light a candle and say some prayers. I have always loved Halloween and the fall season in general. I’m hoping my schedule will slow up a bit so I can hit a few parties. xoxox Much Love, Light and Laughter in this most somber season, xoxox The Mistress

(WANT TO SEE your question in my column ~ write in )

** Dear Mistress,

I just got into a little trouble with drinking and driving. I had to put a Tox-A-Lock device in my truck. My boyfriend takes my truck to work on a regular basis. He hates the Blow Suck Blow. There is nothing sexual about it, but he feels weird and I cant stop laughing since he is making such a big deal about it. How do we resolve this matter?

~ ~ Dear Blow Suck Blow,

Suck Blow Suck after he Blow Suck Blows. (Is that so hard? Get it?)

**Dear Mistress,

There’s  this CrAzY Harley riding girl that I totally want to go out with but…..

~ ~ Friggin Whimp ~ Readers I can’t even print the rest of this whiny BS… you nanzy panzy chicken “s**t” just ask the girl out, your whimpiness might be a breath of fresh air for her and maybe you’ll grow a set of b@lls.

** Dear Mistress,

Ugh, my guy is making me sick. He wants me to grow the hair in, on a certain part of my body that I keep neat and shaven. I can’t do it, it’s just nasty and it reminds me of bigfoot. He claims if I grow it in a certain act will be provided more often ………

~ ~ Dear Big Bush ~ ooooooooh you get “the cut off”….let bigfoot come into play and if he doesn’t provide a lot of THAT act immediately, baby bald it!

(holy crap where do these people come from)

** Dear Mistress,

My housemate is really cool, cute, and funny as anything. He’s dating this psycho, who drinks excessively, curses him out constantly, always bitching on the phone on how little he brings in compared to her, blah blah blah. I would love to show him how it feels to be treated by a normal gir,l who won’t act like that. Got any suggestions?

~ ~ But of course deary, of course, that’s why you wrote in……Just bide your time. He will piss off, get disgusted and bingo bango…..make your move, you will know when the time is right.

PSA….A happy 27th Birthday to my wonderful son Johnny on the 18th.

A Big I Miss You Grandma in Queens(now in Heaven) on the 25th!

Leave a Reply