Air Out Your Laundry Dec-15

HO HO HO MERRY CHRISTMAS!
I love this holiday season, I love snowflakes, snow people and of course SNOW. I know many of you
don’t feel this way, but my circle of people seem to be calmer and more peaceful. We reflect and finish projects before the New Year rings in. What gets me most of all, is people seem to be more generous, caring and polite! I want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year with much peace and prosperity!

Dear, what do we call you now?
My very close friend and I opened a restaurant together. He runs it and I am the backer. Everything was great, even opening night was going so well, until I went in back and I saw my friend sneezing on the food we were about to serve. Of course, I wasn’t going to let the food go out like that …

* Hey- What do you call me? What do you call your restaurant?
I’m thinking you need a lawyer, inbox me at themistress625@gmail.com and I’ll give you the
number to a great lawyer to get you out of that Snotty Position!!!

Dear G
Some things never cease to amaze me, I was very close with a male friend who became a housemate (strictly platonic), later on started to date a girl friend of mine. I warned him she was a bit nutty (ok seriously psychotic), but he pissed off at me, moved out with no calls returned and ended up on my door step with a black eye a years or so later. I of course took him back in and now…

* And now… you have a hot mess on your hands. Let me guess. She’s showing up at your place, screaming on your doorstep and doing stupid stuff…… blah blah blah …….if he doesn’t call the cops, u better…and get an order of protection. On second thought, forget the legal mumbo jumbo, it takes way too long and usually ends up being a big waste of time. Try this – get a big bucket of cold water with ice cubes, open the door and douse her with it every time she comes on your property. After a while, she will either stay away, or drop dead of pneumonia.

Dear G,
As per my email address, you are going to know right off the bat who I’m talking about as soon
as you read the first line. I’ve been dating a guy and I found out he’s married. I dumped him, but took him back. I’m still dating him years later. I know he loves me and hoping that this time he will divorce his wife, so we can have a real life together. What do you think?

* What do I think?? I think you are a very stupid woman, who is waiting for a bus that will never arrive at your stop!

MY PICK OF THE MONTH

Yo G,
I frequent a gin mill and lately I’ve notice at the end of the bar an older woman who seems to be
Lonely, so I decided to make conversation with her. Pleasant at first but then …..

* Yup, but then it’s 40 bucks later, with her crying about her X she can’t get over and you not being
able to rid yourself of her. RUN FOREST RUN!

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